Crumpets Florentine with Pimped-Up Beans

This works on so many levels!

I'm Popeye The Crumpet Man! Toot Toot!

Preparation: 20 minutes Serves: 8 crumpets
Cooking: 15 minutes Cold-buttered crumpets
Ingredients Quantity (metric) Quantity (imperial)
Pimped-Up Beans
Baked beans (you know the brand to choose) 400 g 14 oz
Haricot beans (undrained weight) (drained and rinsed) 400 g 14 oz
Passata 400 g 14 oz
Celery salt 1 tsp 1 tsp
Ground cinnamon 1 tsp 1 tsp
Ground cumin 1 tsp 1 tsp
Red chilli (de-seeded and finely chopped) 1 tbsp 1 tbsp
Red onion (finely chopped) 2 tbsp 2 tbsp
Red pepper (de-seeded and finely chopped) 3 tbsp 3 tbsp
Cherry tomatoes (de-seeded and finely chopped) 3 tbsp 3 tbsp
Salt and pepper Plenty Plenty
Cheddar cheese (finely cubed) 2 tbsp 2 tbsp
Fresh coriander (finely chopped) 2 tbsp 2 tbsp
Poached eggs
Free-range eggs 8 8
White wine vinegar 1 tsp 1 tsp
Young spinach 400 g 14 oz
Butter 25 g 0.9 oz
Salt and pepper Not too little Not too much

    The beans

    1. This really is haute cuisine for beginners: lob everything apart from the cheese and coriander into a large non-stick pan, bring to the boil, reduce to a gentle simmer and cook for 15 minutes.
    2. Add the cheese and cook for a further 3 minutes, then stir in the coriander immediately before serving.
    3. The ingredients enjoy each other's company, so feel free to leave and reheat a few minutes later.
    4. The beans combo really could contain anything that you fancy so we absolutely insist that you take full ownership of your pimping project.

    The poached eggs

    1. Get yourself 4 of the freshest eggs you can find (see notes below).
    2. Bring a large pan of water to the boil, reduce to a rolling simmer and add the vinegar.
    3. Stir the water round and round to create a whirlpool in the middle of the pan, then crack the egg in the centre. The vortex helps to keep the egg nice and compact. The process is exactly the same if you have an egg poaching pouch. You can do more than one egg at a time, as long as you can keep them in the vortex.
    4. Each egg should take about 3 minutes. 

    The spinach

    1. Wash the spinach in cold water and drain in a colander.
    2. Add it to a large pan, with the butter, salt and pepper, and cook on a medium heat for about a minute, until all the leaves start to wilt.
    3. Remove the spinach and drain well in the colander. Return it to the pan on a medium heat for a further 30 seconds to finish.

    The crumpets

    1. Spoon on the spinach whilst hot to start melting the butter, add the eggs, then get your beans flowing.         



Fresh eggs

Thanks to our health and safety overlords, supermarkets in the UK are only allowed to sell eggs that have a red lion stamp, reflecting vaccinations to prevent various unpleasantries. The process of getting this done apparently takes a minimum of a week, meaning that even if you buy the freshest eggs in the shop, it’s been some while since they left the coop. To be honest, poached eggs from the supermarket will be fine, but if you’re aiming for Michelin stars, you might want to get yourself down to a local farm.